The CALL - The Light --- Psalm 18

It is you who light my lamp; the LORD, my God, lights up my darkness. (v.28)


Father, right now I am struggling to see, to find direction regarding my writing. There have been so many times Lord when I have taken paths that have lead no where.

Then the light comes on…..

“They lead no where”, HE says, “because you are not using the gifts I have given you nor following my calling. Do both and you will be fine.”

I reckon that is His way of reminding me that this journey started as a result of “running from my passion”. It can find a “conclusion” to some degree in returning to that passion.

I don’t often talk about my “calling”. It’s not something I like to think about a lot. I suppose because it hurts a great deal to do so. And it’s definitely not something I enjoy verbalizing. In some ways it is like asking a father to talk about a child that has died; or a husband to talk about his life long companion who has passed. It simply hurts the heart too much.

It wasn’t that long after I came to Christ that I began to sense God’s calling to the pulpit. Unlike some stories you may hear, I did not rebuff that urging rather I embraced it as a privilege. Once I acknowledge the “call”, it was full speed ahead after that. It’s my nature – “full speed ahead” that is. Every chance I got, I would step behind the pulpit to proclaim God’s Word. It ignited my soul, it enthused me; it motivated me; it was what I lived for!

Well, if you know me – or have followed some of “The Way of the Wolf” you know portions of what happened to end all of that. But here is the crux of the matter. Once I left the pulpit – everything I have done after that has been second best. I knew it then, I know it now.

Here are the questions that I don’t know the answer to, but am beginning to discover:

Does God rescind his call?

Can that calling to the pulpit be re-directed to print?

Am I, as they say, “a day late and a dollar short” all the way around?

It is you who light my lamp; the LORD, my GOD, lights up my darkness.

Help me to see well enough to follow Father. May it be!